To my fellow singles:  Have you ever felt like the devil has a radar on your love life? You swear off dating for a while; you just want to mind your business, work on yourself, build better relationships with loved ones and God, advance in your career and BAM!  Someone unexpectedly slides in your DMs.  No.

All jokes aside, I’m in that space.  Look, I’ve dating since I was 17 and I am tired, TIRED.  I’ve decided to use my singleness and late-20s to be selfish, explore interests, and grow as a woman.  But there was a time when I proclaimed the above and it was a bold face lie.  I was the epitome of fake it til you make it.  I kept telling myself I didn’t want to date/I’m not ready for a relationship yet I was entertaining every Tom, Joe, and Bob.  It wasn’t until this year I put my foot down and decided to date myself.  We owe it to ourselves to really figure out who we are and what we want before we involve ourselves with someone else.  We must let go of all the baggage and hurt; we owe that to ourselves and significant others.

Funny thing is now that I’m serious about getting my act together, it seems that every man I’ve dealt with in the past suddenly declare they’ve changed and want a second chance to prove themselves to me.  If it were a year ago, I would consider this being the Lord’s way of showing me it’s my time and maybe I should give that guy another chance. But it isn’t the Lord rather the devil himself.  What I mean is, him feeding the loneliness that sometimes sneaks up in singleness.  You know, that moment when you’re finally in a place of real healing and he just wants to throw a wrench in your life. NOT TODAY SATAN!

One thing I’ve realized in singlehood is whoever is for me is for me.  There will be no doubt, no question. It may be a struggle sometimes especially if everyone around you is getting engaged, married, and having kids.  You may even third and fifth wheel it. And that’s okay.  Just live your life. You will find that you’re happier single than that toxic, dead-end situation you called a relationship.  Take this time to rediscover yourself and remain firm in your desires and beliefs.

You’ll know when you’re ready to be in courtship with someone.  Don’t let loneliness (the devil) temp you.

Enjoy this time!


Something to think about…

  1. How have you struggled in this season of singlehood?
  2. Have you taken the time to rediscover yourself?
    • How have you grown during this season?
  3. How do you avoid temptation in this season?



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